Bringing some good news.

[Terraniux]

*Edited my post*

I have found insight in how my visious circels stay(ed) on reloop.
The negativity, hate and anger. I have been talking to myself for hours, days long. For months I was often drunk and barely sober. Smoked too much and lived like a vampire. (Reversed day and night rhythm)

Before I saw nothing but hate, and evil in everything. But I learned something by reflecting (onto) the past:
You can't recognize any good in the world as long your own light is dimmed. To spread love you need to know yourself and forgive yourself. A person can say 'Thank you' for doing something that was in your purest intention. You can't give, what you dont have. This was the key I was looking for.

But still, duality is a b!tch. It is the invisible mirror in front of you that reveals itself when you ask yourself 'Who am I?' after you have done something terrible you didn't want to happen in your deepest core.

All these fights I had in real life, the people I have hurt so much psycially and on the mental plane they knew I couldn't help it. I missed 'the' information. I have been in jail too. After the summer here has ended August / September I will moving to another place, which I hope to be my last. Man, I'm tired of moving from house to house. My enemies are not enemies anymore. Triggering hate to a certain person makes him an illusionary enemy.

I didn't love UT and mapping anymore cause I refused to use it. If I only just started a single player deathmatch game, looked around the architecture and ambience spreaded inside, that would kickstart the engine. If you know what I'm trying to tell.

All my current, half made projects and stuff are going (temporary)to the trashcan. I still keep some backups of them. I am gonna try to make CrystalUnreal 2.0 a big succes, and focus on some brand new project I have thought of. It will be unlike you have ever seen. The future is in my unreal life and realife is looking bright so far. I wish the same to all who are reading this. My enemies are not enemies anymore. Friends will be friends.

I would like to thank you all for the support and wisdom you all given me so far.
Especially Hook & Hermskii.

[Terraniux]

Edited my post, added a few lines.

[Kelly]

Well, let's get it on handsome! You see me first if you need any custom script work. I'll damn well support you.

[Terraniux]

Thanks Kelly, I will!

[Hermskii]

I think I'm gonna cry. Quick! Someone pull my man-card again.

OK Terra. I hope to see you take some sweet time and really think about what direction you want to go and then discuss it lots and then start going that way real slow. Congrats on gaining more sight into your own future and how to manage it too! Sorry it took me so long to reply to this too by the way.

[Terraniux]

No problem Hermskii, yours and Hook's reply is always worth waiting for

[Hook]

I am too tired at the moment to know exactly what is going on, but it sounds good Terra!
I am also here for you buddy!

[Terraniux]

Bringing even more good news.
I feel like I'm having a 'divine' blessing atm. It seems at after my eyes were opened, my world changed completly. (perhaps you could fill this in for me in Hermskii or Hook, I don't know how to put this is in proper english.)

I actually have real friends around me, and recently a lovely girlfriend too!
Working on CU2.0 is gonna be hard when she is absorbing my time haha.

Love is the magic word ppl! It changed mine, now let it change yours if it hasnt already!
I feel absolutly great. Cheers!

[Hermskii]

Yep. That is right Love is good. Now go have some coffee too!

On a more serious note: I can choose to open my eyes each day and look for issues or I can open them and look for things to be grateful for. I find my day ends much better if I focus on what is good in life rather than what isn't. Everyone around me appreciates it too I think.

[Hook]

I thank God at Least every day for what he has given me, and also for His help he gives me every day of my life!

Great to hear this good stuff from you Terraniux!